Prologue

I learned something new about myself today.  It was down amongst the clack-clackity-clack of the subway cars.  I was sifting through the trash, looking for a half-eaten hotdog I had seen a man throw in there earlier when I heard the announcement.

"Grand Avenue Newtown.  Next stop Woodhaven Boulevard."

I looked up.  Watched as the masses pushed their ways onto the train.  They were coming or going.  I told myself they were slaves to their wages, chained to their desks.  But here I was digging through a trash can, chained to it so to speak.

No, that's not what I learned.  I've known that.  I found the hotdog, the yellow mustard staining the bun.  I hated mustard, it gave me heartburn.  But an empty stomach hurt worse.  I shoved the food into my mouth in three bites.  I was still chewing the third when it happened.  The subway doors closed and I heard a scream.

"NO!   No, please," she cried out.  It took me a minute to find her.  Them.  I watched in slow motion, listening to the drip drip of the water.  It was raining outside.  Oh, yeah.  Them.  A red head, short, mid twenties.  In my younger, cleaner days, I might have approached her, was trying to pull away from him.  I had seen him before, dressed in blue jeans and a black hoodie.He held her blouse with his left hand, the switchblade in his right.

I learned something about myself today.

I am a coward.